December 15, 2011

Weather Outside is Frightful Claims New York Woman

A New York woman today claimed that the weather outside her door was absolutely "frightful." She said she had bought some corn for popping, which she planned on sharing with her husband after turning the lights way down low.

It is highly unlikely that any of the residents of Flushing, New York will be going any place soon because of the frightful weather. "Snow is coming down like dandruff off my uncle Jack," said Steve Rettick. But he added that he planned on making some snowmen, so he encouraged a little snow. "What this town needs is a good nine feet of snow. I've got no place to go, so I say let it snow, let it snow, let it snow."

One man was not so happy about the wintry weather. "The fire was slowly dying and we were still good-bying. But then I finally kissed her goodnight and I had to go out in this storm. It's awful. It's so cold outside my tongue froze to the roof of my mouth as I was walking home."

In related news, a woman told her baby it was cold outside. The baby gurgled and picked its nose.

Photo by Gray Marchiori-Simpson